It's been since July since I've hiked or backpacked. Too much stuff going on with Simone's wedding and then buying a house to do any weekend hikes. As a result, I've noticed an increase in agitation and irritation with moods of melancholy and introspection. My house is chaos. I'm not getting enough quality alone time, wilderness time, and just plain old me time. I have no hiking plans, no permits applied for, nothing on the forseeable horizon. Hopefully, once escrow closes I can change that.
I was laying in bed last night thinking about the trail, any trail, and all the things I miss about it. I was surprised to realize I missed even the painful and mundane things.
I miss sparkling alpine lakes, sun glittering off the surface like winking stars.
I miss sharp, chilly morning air scented with pines.
I miss throbbing feet at day's end.
I miss the gentle curve of the trail as it winds through canyons and verdant meadows.
I miss Mountain House beef stew.
I miss sitting in the dirt, my legs stuck out across the trail, gazing at distant mountains.
I miss the camraderie of my hiking pals.
I miss laying down after a hard day and feeling my spine release into the ground.
I miss the cold edge of granite.
I miss the feel of my hipbelt, slipping around my hips like an embrace.
I miss the anticipation; the sweet feeling of challenges to come.
I miss that first breathtaking sting, as swollen feet are lowered into a frigid creek.
I miss the night sky beaming at me with shooting stars.
I miss sunrises over pristine lakes and mountain peaks.
I miss the freedom of crazy hair and no make-up.
I miss the introspective daydreaming that occurs while filtering water.
I miss the wonderland of marmots, pikas, and butterflies.
So many things, I could go on.
“I remember my childhood names for grasses and secret flowers. I remember where
a toad may live and what time the birds awaken in the summer -- and what trees
and seasons smelled like -- how people looked and walked and smelled even. The
memory of odors is very rich.”
-John Steinbeck in East of Eden
